A one-dollar bill (or loonie) met a twenty-dollar bill and said, “Hey, where have you been? I haven’t seen you around here much.”

The twenty answered, “I’ve been hanging out at the casinos, went on a cruise and did the rounds of the ship, back to the United States for a while, went to a couple of baseball games, to the mall, that kind of stuff. How about you?”

The one dollar bill (or loonie) said, “You know, same old stuff – church, church, church.”

Here’s a collection of shorter funnies on faith.

Rev. Warren J. Keating, Pastor of the First Presbyterian Church of Yuma, AZ., says that the best prayer he ever heard was, “Lord, please make me the kind of person my dog thinks I am.”

A student was asked to list the 10 Commandments in any order. His response was: 3, 6, 1, 8, 4, 5, 9, 2, 10, 7.

A woman was at the beach with her children when her four-year-old son ran up to me, grabbed my hand and led me to the shore where a sea gull lay dead in the sand. “Mommy, what happened to him?” my son asked. “He died and went to heaven,” I replied. My son thought a moment and then said, “And God threw him back down?”

After the church service a little boy told the pastor, “When I grow up, I’m going to give you some money. “Well, thank you,” the pastor replied. “But why?” “Because,” the boy responded, “my daddy says you’re one of the poorest preachers we’ve ever had.”

A woman invited some people over for dinner. At the table she turned to her six-year-old daughter and said, “Would you like to say the blessing?” The girl replied, “I wouldn’t know what to say.” “Just say what you heard Mommy say,” the mother answered. The daughter bowed her head and said, “Lord, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner?

One beautiful Sunday morning, a Minister announced to his congregation: “My good people, I have here in my hands three sermons — a $1,000 sermon that lasts five minutes, a $500 sermon that lasts fifteen minutes, and a $100 sermon that lasts a full hour. Now, we’ll take the collection and see which one I’ll deliver.”