A wife invited some people to dinner. At the table, she turned to their six-year-old daughter and said, “Would you like to say the blessing?”

“I wouldn’t know what to say,” the girl replied.

“Just say what you hear Mommy say,” the wife answered.

The daughter bowed her head and said, “Lord, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner?”

If you love something, set it free.
If it comes back, it was, and always will be yours.
If it never returns, it was never yours to begin with.

If it just sits in your living room, messes up your stuff,
eats your food, uses your telephone, takes your money, and
never behaves as if you actually set it free in the first place,
you either married it or gave birth to it.

In a certain town, there were two brothers, 8 and 10 years old, who were exceedingly mischievous. Whatever went wrong in the neighborhood, it turned out they had had a hand in it. Their parents were at their wits’ end trying to control them. Finally they went to the Minister in the local church who had done some work with trouble childrens, and asked the Minster to talk to their boys.

The Ministered agreed to talk to the boys but he wanted to speak to the youngest one first. So the mother sent him into the Minister’s office.

The Minister sat the boy down across a huge, impressive desk he sat behind. For about five minutes they just sat and stared at each other. Finally, the Minister pointed his forefinger at the boy and asked, “Where is God?”

The boy looked under the desk, in the corners of the room, all around, but said nothing.

Again, louder, the Minister pointed at the boy and asked, “Where is God?”

Again the boy looked all around but said nothing. A third time, in a louder, firmer voice, the Minister leaned far across the desk and put his forefinger almost to the boy’s nose, and asked, “Where is God?”

The boy panicked and ran all the way home. Finding his older brother, he dragged him upstairs to their room and into the closet, where they usually plotted their mischief. He finally said, “We are in BIIIIG trouble.”

The older boy asked, “What do you mean, BIG trouble?”

His brother replied, “God is missing and they think we did it.”