• Plan ahead. It wasn’t raining when Noah built the ark.
• Stay fit. When you’re 600 years old, someone might ask you to do something REALLY big.
• Don’t listen to critics — do what has to be done.
• Build on high ground.
• For safety’s sake, travel in pairs.
• Two heads are better than one.
• Speed isn’t always an advantage. The cheetahs were on board, but so were the snails.
• If you can’t fight or flee — float!
• Take care of your animals as if they were the last ones on earth.
• Don’t forget that we’re all in the same boat.
• When the doo-doo gets really deep, don’t sit there and complain — shovel!!!
• Stay below deck during the storm.
• Remember that the ark was built by amateurs and the Titanic was built by professionals.
• If you have to start over, have a friend by your side.
• Remember that the woodpeckers INSIDE are often a bigger threat than the storm outside.
• Don’t miss the boat.
• No matter how bleak it looks, there’s always a rainbow on the other side.

“We’ve traveled together, my Bible and I,
Through all kinds of weather, with smile or with a sigh!
In sorrow or in sunshine, in tempest or calm!
Thy friendship unchanging, my lamp and my psalm.

We’ve traveled together, my Bible and I,
When life had grown weary, and death e’en nigh!
But all through the darkness of mist or of wrong,
I found a solace, a prayer and a song.

So now who shall part us, my Bible and I?
Shall “isms” or schisms, or “new light” who try?
Shall shadow for substance, or stone for good bread,
Supplant thy sound wisdom, give folly instead?

Ah, no, my dear Bible, exponent of light!
Thou sword of the Spirit, put error to flight!
And still through life’s journey, until my last sigh,
We’ll travel together, my Bible and I.”

They lie on the table side by side
The Holy Bible and the T.V. Guide
One is well worn and cherished with pride,
Not the Bible, but the T.V. Guide

One is used daily to help folks decide
No, not the Bible, but the T.V.Guide
As the pages are turned, what shall they see
Oh, what does it matter, turn on the T.V.

So they open the book in which they confide
No, not the Bible, but the T.V. Guide
The Word of God is seldom read
Maybe a verse before they fall into bed.

Exhausted and sleepy and tired as can be
Not from reading the Bible, from watching T.V.
so then back to the table side by side,
Lie the Holy Bible and the T.V. Guide.

No time for prayer, no time for the Word,
The plan of Salvation is seldom heard.
But forgiveness of sin, so full and free,
Is found in the Bible, not on T.V.